Themes: Grief, Love, Death, and the New Year

Some opening closing thoughts...

Jan 02, 2026

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WHENEVER I APPROACH a horoscope, the first thing I look for are recurring themes. Or at least a central motif. Sometimes these patterns are loud and pulsing, and sometimes patience is required to tease out the subtle ways that a theme can conceal itself. But they are always there, and for me, once spotted, this is what jump-starts a reading.

Regarding an astro theme, 2025 was screamingly loud for me. All the transits (I do not employ progressions or solar arcs, etc.) were iterations of, well, to start, Saturn occupying the 8th house of my chart. Like a relentless squatter, the planet transited back and forth across natal Mars. And then squatted some more after retrograding out of Aries. Once Pluto moved into Aquarius, all the Scorpio/Pluto themes that were primed to dominate my year flicked into neon.

And so, event-wise, mortality was uppermost. I’d say I lost more family members, spiritual teachers and close friends in bam-bam-bam succession than at any other time in my life. Many of these were shockers, in that the folks were younger than I, and some cut deep—my 32-year-old niece receiving a cancer diagnosis was heartbreaking. But losing my devoted friend Tim (right about this time last year) waylaid me the most. Typical of his Sagittarius Sun, his death announced, in a blunt voice, “OK, get ready for more of this, dude.”

Tim came to me as a client, god, 16 years ago. This was unusual, at least for me as an astrologer on the island. I’d say 95% of my clients are women. And if you met or saw a picture of Tim towering beside his decrepit pickup truck (he was a contractor and handyman and stood about 6’ 4”), you’d be head-scratching, too. Over the years we evolved out of the client relationship and into a solid friendship. He also became the guy who kept my home functional, from roof to basement—building things, installing things, repairing things, and removing things.

I’m a Cancer, so there's a direct sort of etheric hardwiring between me and my home. And the thing about Tim’s passing is that wherever I moved about through my home last year, I’d see his handiwork. A restored cabinet, an installed heater, or a gigantic tropical plant that he helped me transplant into a gigantic container.

Sometimes seeing all of these domestic vestiges was OK, in a comforting way, but then occasionally, out of the blue, I’d find myself staring at a repaired wall and start bawling. My biggest regret, and I think this happens between men a lot (Tim was straight), is that I didn’t express more of my love and appreciation to him directly. A realization like that, after the fact, can invite grief.

Although seeing this interview with the actor Andrew Garfield, the other day, lifted me up through the holiday. And I believe what he says here is true: that grief is an expression of unexpressed love. Naturally, when Garfield started talking about his mom, I lost it. And then everyone in my close circle that had passed this year started parading through my head. In bed at night I’d lie back and imagine them in front of me. I thanked each one for the luck I felt in our finding each other. For the luck and the love.

I know people make this joke often, and it’s incredibly tacky to broach it within this post, but I’m going to do it anyway because it’s how I feel deep in my bones: It makes me fucking crazy that someone like, say, Jane Goodall died last year (or, for that matter, any of my friends that I’ve mentioned), while Trump continues to breathe, squawk, and blather within his cloud of self-misery and endless grievances. This unjust fact is why I’m agnostic. (I also don’t ‘believe’ in karma.)

In fact, this was a year that any part of me aligned with ‘belief’ of this or that was jettisoned (more Pluto themes). And what a fucking relief. Free—free at last—from having to lug around some notion that may or may not be true, an opinion that maintained an image of myself that had nothing to do with the question of ‘what’ any of us ‘is.’ I mean, who the fuck knows? I’m happy to settle completely with ‘not knowing.’ Again, the freedom.

Anyway, this post started out one way and swerved in a different direction. Probably another theme, a prescient one, for the new year, with Pluto still drilling into the Moon-Uranus vector in my natal chart. The good thing about Pluto transits is that once the initial registration occurs (where the leg or arm is amputated), the latter part of the transit can call forth Pluto’s role as healer and reformer.

I’m ready for reform. (Or as my friend Carter framed it in his recent newsletter—his word of the year is ‘release.’) I’m also prearranging my brain for a significant career shift as Saturn moves into the ninth house of my chart (and my Jeffrey Dahmer romance novel is finally published—I decided to wait for the upcoming Saturn-Neptune conjunction this February to mark the book’s official debut).

On the theme of Saturn-Neptune and its upcoming era-defining zero degrees Aries nexus, I wrote this the other day:

For the first time in eight years, the globe is readying for a profound elemental shift. The planets that symbolize key sociopolitical movements will soon reside in new elements. Uranus moves into an Air sign. Neptune into a Fire sign. And Pluto will remain in Aquarius, also an Air sign. Saturn, the accountability force, will move into a Fire sign as well. That’s a lot of Air and Fire. A lot of heat. A lot of impatience.

Air and Fire are untethered and indeterminate. Air reminds us of our universality. And Fire—well, Fire as spirit keeps everything vital and in motion. Air fuels Fire. An urgency to ‘shove off’ will dominate our mindset this year.

In numerology 2026 is a ‘1’ year. In the Chinese Zodiac, we’re leaving behind the shedding process of the Year of the Snake and moving into the Year of the Horse (giddy up, people).

Everyone is ready to exit the blurry 15-year-long Neptune-Pisces birth canal. The theme being transmitted right now is something like, “A new type of courage (Aries) is about to be envisioned (Neptune)—and we all want to embody it (Saturn).”

Happy New Year, everyone, and thank you for your support into 2026!

Love,